Let's talk today with you about the desire for idealism in everything, both at work and in personal relationships - and what it can lead to. ..
Striving for perfection is a natural desire of any person!
We all strive to be the first in school, work or personal life.
And if it comes to women, then they try their best: the
- aspire to a perfectly clean house, the
- always has excellent suppers, the
- has the same towels hanging in the bathroom in size, the
- looks perfect.
However, in pursuit of perfectionism, many forget that ideal people do not exist and a light mess in the house sometimes looks much nicer than the perfect order.
And if you notice a tendency to everything ideal, then it's worth considering how to get rid of the perfectionism of .
What is perfectionism and what does it eat?
Before getting rid of perfectionism, let's examine what it is and where it comes from.
So, perfectionism is a person's striving for perfection and an ideal in everything.
In any case, the perfectionist tries to make it perfect!
For example, a perfectionist undertakes to write an essay and can work on it for a week, or even two.
Why is it taking so long?
Yes, because an ordinary person picks up something, the next day re-reads, corrects, checks the errors and surrenders for verification.
But the perfectionist will approach the case in the opposite way.
He will sit on each line, correct it until it becomes blue, striving for perfect suggestions.
Syndrome of chronic fatigue: symptoms and methods of struggle
By the way, he can not finish the job, as the process itself is so exhausted that the end of the affair may not remain.
Where does perfectionism come from?
In most cases, in the perfectionism of a person, parents are to blame.
"How?", You ask. Now I will explain.
Surely at school, your parents made you perfect to take out zakarjlyuchki in the recipe, clean the room until blue and arrange toys in the right order. And maybe they told you that the salt should stand strictly in the middle of the table, and the nozzle of the saltcellar look strictly to the west.
And from many children, parents demanded perfect grades, better results at school and properly tied bows.
As a result of all this, "must" and "must", many people grow up to be creepy perfectionists.
Healthy perfectionism helps people, develops them and helps them quickly achieve their goals.
However, in most cases the pathological form of perfectionism, which makes people unhappy, those who like to complain about life, prevails.
In the second scenario, you need to think urgently how to get rid of perfectionism. Here in this we will help you further.
How to get rid of perfectionism - start to work on yourself
Tip 1. Identify the pathological perfectionist
To get rid of any psychological problem, you must first recognize it.
Perfectionism is no exception.
Therefore, in a calm environment, analyze your actions and recognize the existence of a problem.
Of course, it will be difficult to do this, but this is for you, not the janitor Peter.
To help you, I will list some signs of pathological perfectionism:
- aspiration for unattainable standards,
- doubt in their abilities and abilities,
- sense of guilt for possible mistakes,
- excessive susceptibility to criticism,
- appearing feeling of anger at the sight of something imperfect,
- exaggerated claims to surrounding people,
- constant scandals in the family because of trivia.
If you notice at least half of the above, you have a pathology.
You need to realize the problem and start to get rid of the perfectionism of .
If you think that striving for all the perfect nonsense, then you are deeply mistaken.
Perfectionism not only corrodes a person from within, but also makes all his loved ones nervous.
Normal people do not understand the frenzy of a perfectionist, whereas the latter can not calm down until they bring everything to an ideal state.
Tip 2. Act instead of sitting
A frequent problem of perfectionism is excessive thinking activity.
For example: "I want to start my own business, but first I need to issue documents. .. but no, first I'll come up with a good name for my own firm. .. no, first you need to pick a good office, furniture. .. and office supplies should be the same color, one firm, onestyle, etc "...
Do not think, start acting.
After only beginning to act, you will see the real results of your work and start solving real, not invented, tasks.
By the way, having started acting, you will begin to think less about any garbage and concentrate on the ideal performance of a certain task.
Tip 3. It is impossible to like absolutely everything
Remember: no matter how well you do your job, there will always be people who will not like it.
That's why it's not necessary to correct the report, presentation or text before blueing.
After all, someone will be delighted with the work with small defects, and someone might not like even an ideal presentation.
Be sure to look at the interesting movie,
where on real examples tell what leads perfectionism!
Tip 4. To get rid of perfectionism, you need to learn how to delegate the affairs of
. In most cases, perfectionists do everything themselves, because they believe that other people are not able to do the job just as well.
That's why you should start shifting some of your responsibilities to someone else.
Start with trivial matters in the family, and then switch to work.
The main thing is when you are commissioning someone to work, do not try to remodel it later.
Tell yourself to "come down and so."
Of course, such words do not mean at all that the work should be done on the tyap-bluff, but it's also not worth constantly returning to it in search of small jambs.