No matter how enchantingly the career developed, the coat from Valentino himself and the new trend manicure did not please, it all seems like a real garbage if the mind is beating desperately: " Nobody likes ."
We propose to approach the solution of this problem from all possible sides, making you the "most charming and attractive" young lady in a radius of thousands of kilometers, so that no one doubts your irresistibility.
10 reasons why you can claim "No one likes me" - find the enemy and render harmless
Before wringing your hands in despair and with the world's sorrow in the eyes of claiming that no one likes me, check to see if you recognize yourself in onefrom these "wonderful" types:
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nobody likes people who go too far with different antics and jokes.
Well, swallow you are ours, it's one thing to whisper quietly to a girlfriend that she has teeth in lipstick and quite another - to "insulate" her husband that while he was on a business trip, she was seen in the company of two brave jigits in the cafe "Snowdrop»;
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no one will be glad to the person from those people who, on the question "How are you?" Begin to lament about their bitter fate, like professional mourners at a funeral.
Even if your cat is poisoned, the boss forced to go to work on the day off, and the beloved man and completely disappeared behind the horizon, try to picture something like a smile and say that everything is fine, you "hold the tail with a gun" and no onedarkens your wonderful mood;
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no one likes people who seem arrogant and inaccessible.
So lower your nose at least half a centimeter and smile at the world;
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no one favors people who are always justified.
If you really slept for work, then admit to the boss honestly and promise to "redeem the blame" with shock work, and do not compose a "legend" on the run about the sick and the son who refused to go to the kindergarten.
Nobody believes in these "fables";
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no one will be pleased to communicate with a person who has a negative opinion about everyone and everything.
Believe me, bad weather is not a catastrophe of universal proportions, but a book that you did not like personally is not "dull paper";
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no one likes people who talk too much.
Psychologists for the thousandth time remind that the main condition for successful communication is the ability to listen, and therefore do not part in the conversation like a machine gun. Give the chance to the interlocutor and tell you something.
Nobody likes to be just a passive listener;
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nobody is delighted with people who are all dramatizing.
Such people, even from buying expired cheese, can make a solid thriller with elements of drama and tragedy;
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no one likes people who are "reinforced" confident in their rightness and unlimited authority.
Hmm, well, a normal person can not equally well understand the aubergine varieties and skin diseases.
Let in conversation and to someone else "flash" intellect and bask in the rays of glory;
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no one is delighted with people who are firmly convinced that they are the center of the universe and the crown of the universe.
As the friend of the author of the article says: "Of course, I love myself for a long time, but the rest are also wonderful people, with the same two hands, feet and head as I have."
Take the height: 5 steps to ensure that you never had a reason to say that no one likes me!
If the problem "No one loves me" you have realized and are ready "to look burning" to rush to solve it, we advise you to go through each of these stages slowly:
Step # 1. "Fold" yourself an adequate price.
Mom did not kiss you as a child before going to bed? You were not given a doll Barbie for every five in mathematics and forced( that's monsters!) To wash the dishes after dinner? Because nobody loves you?
Assemble, it was a couple of decades ago!
And people love and respect not those who delve into children's grievances and their complexes, but those who go through life easily( we would even say dancing).
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work on your appearance and fix everything that casts you down in despair, but is amenable to correction to love yourself.
Maybe it's worth throwing a couple of kilograms to climb into a summer sarafan? Or to rush into the solarium, so that the skin does not so cast a noble blue?
"My story of self-love began with the fact that I killed" half a day "in order to disassemble my wardrobe.
Those things that categorically did not suit - threw away, and those to which I had "claims" - carried in the studio and remade so that they sit on me gorgeously.
The order in the closet and the ideal wardrobe inspire me every morning, in terms of proportions and style, not cost. "Svetlana from Tyumen shares her experience.The same "therapeutic" effect has repair, rearrangement or general cleaning in the house;
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make a new hobby, if nobody likes it.
Do whatever you want - even study Japanese calligraphy, even jump with a parachute - if only it made your eyes shine brighter than a star on the Kremlin's Spassky Tower and love life and yourself in it.
Eugene from Sumy says: "I always considered myself a typical, watered" botanka "and suffered from the fact that no one likes me.
But once I read about the fact that the city hosts the championship on the intellectual game "What? Where? When? "And, having collected the will into a fist, went to this event.
And you know what? I became a real "star" and won the title of the best player of the season. It was such a thrill!
And then it turned out that the guys from my team are fond of speleology. Now, every weekend we climb through the caves.
I found my "flock", where I am loved and appreciated for who I am, no one condemns " -
do not be selfish and find a way to help those who need it, if nobody loves.
And do not "swing" at once to the hungry children of Sudan, help the old neighbor with purchases or the fatigued child of many children.
At the "kraynyak" feed the remnants of the chicken of the shabby cat from the garbage dump and there will be at least one creature who will love you unselfishly;
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if no one likes, try to do something new every day or find out.
Expand your horizons!
Let it be at least a new route from work to home or a non-alcoholic mulled wine instead of the usual American.
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read the book of authoritative psychologists on how to say goodbye to low self-esteem and love yourself, try out their recommendations in practice, for example:
No. Author, title 1 V.Levi "The art of being yourself" 2 E.Robert "The mainsecrets of absolute self-confidence » 3 S.Mamontov« Believe in yourself. Self-confidence training » 4 M. Smith" Self-confidence training " 5 R. Bach" The Seagull named John Livingston " 6 A.Notomb" Fear and Awe " 7 D.Millman" The Way of the Peaceful Warrior " 8 P.Koello" The Alchemist» 9 D. Murphy« How to become self-confident and raise self-esteem » 10 E. Tarasov" How to increase self-esteem and achieve success " -
solve the problem of low self-esteem and love yourself will help to watch motivating films:
No. Name Country, year of release 1 "Million Dollar Baby" USA, 2004 2 "Devil Wears Prada" USA, 2006 3 "Queen" USA, 2007 4 "Frida" USA, Canada, 2002 5 "Black Book" Germany, Great Britain, 2006 6 "Moscow does not believe in tears" USSR, 1979 7 "Erin Brokovich" USA, 2000 8 "Barefoot on the pavement" Germany, 2005 9 «Head in the clouds» USA, 2004 10 «Eat, m, USA, 2010 11 "Golden Age" Great Britain, 2007 12 "Jeanne D'ark" USA, 1999 13 "And in my heart I'm dancing" Ireland, France, Great Britain, 2004 14 "The Barber of Siberia" Russia, Italy, 1998 15 "Another of the Kind of Boleyn" United Kingdom, 2008
If you whine "No one loves me" because of low self-esteem, try:
If you are proud of the princess's habits, but because of your overestimated self-esteem, people shy away from you, like from a Chinese woman with suspicion of SARS, we advise not to "bathe""The problem" Nobody likes me ", but to think about that:
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you are not( and do not have to) in everything to be a" super-duper ".
Do not know the laws of thermodynamics? Do you suffer from "geographical cretinism" and you can get lost two blocks from your house?
Well, figs with it!
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show respect for other people, even if you are sure that no one likes you.
A strange lady from a neighboring apartment can turn out to be a famous professor of English with a bunch of stories about traveling abroad, and a pimply youth is a brilliant IT man.
So everyone has their own strengths.
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treat calmly to criticism, if nobody likes you because of temper tantrums.
Somehow for eating sushi favorite sushi, the girlfriend reproached the author of the article for the fact that she does not earn enough because she sprays her powers on many projects and does not always know how to say "no" to those who want to download it "on the mosteyebrows "solution of their problems.
Result? After 2 months, earnings increased 1.5 times!
So was it worth it to poke a friend's eye with a stick for sushi, if she sincerely wanted to help?
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if you somewhere "nakosyachili", then do not dump everything on an unsuccessful horoscope, driver Uncle Vanya and politicians, corrupt officials, and calmly analyze your mistakes so as not to repeat them again.
Even if it is a question of an unsuccessful dress style or a spoiled meat cake, your dog has completely refused it.
Step # 2. Believe in your strength, even if you are sure that "Nobody likes me".
So, unlikely, why did you doubt that you can learn English, master a car, prepare a three-story cake and achieve universal adoration? After all, no one has proved you the opposite!
In order for you to completely forget that nobody loves you, we will give you just a few life-affirming examples:
- Nick Vuichich, a man without arms and legs, created a wonderful family, received a quality education, is engaged in swimming, surfing, golf,and between all these fascinating pieces is traveling around the world and motivating desperate people to believe in themselves and love life;
- Thomas Edison invented an electric light bulb from the 2000's attempt, when no one believed in success;
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to the star of militants Sylvester Stalonna at birth caused damage to the nerve endings, so he still partially paralyzes one cheek, lips and tongue.
And in the movies, no one notices and loves the actor with all the heart of hundreds of fans.
Do you still think that to lose 10 kg to fall in love with yourself once and for all is it unrealistic?
Well, well, then stomat to the refrigerator for a piece of a cake with lamentations "No one likes me".
Step # 3. "And we do not care. .. we are not afraid of wolves and owls. ..": get rid of your fears if you tortured everyone with the phrase that nobody loves you.
Experiencing that nobody loves you and never will fall in love with you? So, what exactly is terrible in your life from this?
Let's say you do not have close friends.
Nobody interferes with making your colleagues, someone from classmates or classmates. Yes, and a neighbor of Ira from the 33rd apartment - also a lady, that is necessary.
By the way, do you know that there are at least two people who are always "for you" like, even if you rob a bank, become fat or become a frog, like in a Russian folk tale? Daddy and Mama have long been visiting?
No favorite person? Are you afraid that nobody loves you and you can not create a family?
First, every day the situation can change, and secondly, many charming ladies lived a bright, rich life, not the sviv family nest. Among them - Charlize Theron, Winona Ryder, Coco Chanel and other worthy young ladies.
Many more women spend their lives meditating on watching TV shows and gossip, sighing about the difficult family life and complaining that the husband does not like.
Or do you think that the fullness of life comes down to being able to occupy yourself with washing socks and preparing borsch? No, dear, the family is a kinship of souls, this is the magic of the highest order.
So they do not need to be afraid of the fact that nobody loves you, but the fact that you also do not care for any special sympathy and "grovel" life for whining.
Step # 4. "Calm, just calm": learn to perceive failure as part of personal growth.
If you are in the fact that no one likes you and never supports you, believe more than three Newton's laws, let me remind you:
- the greatest animator of all time, Walt Disney was fired from the newspaper "due to lack of imagination" andno one could think what success it will have in the future;
- stunning director Steven Spielberg twice failed when entering the School of Cinema with a record of "too mediocre";
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Joanne Rowling was denied 12 times before one publisher agreed to release the first book about Harry Potter.
Nobody wanted to mess with a stray housewife;
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King of Horrors Stephen King went around 30( !) Publishers to find something that will agree to publish the cult novel "Kerry".
No one wanted to listen to him!
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unforgettable actress Faina Ranevskaya in the beginning of his career was expelled from one of the Moscow theaters with the label "perfect mediocrity".
And not to love her aphorisms is simply impossible!
Should we continue? You in fact have solved, that "nobody loves me", "I am an absolute nothingness" only because you were devoured by a neighbor's dog, on the days off none of the girlfriends called for a "glass of tea", so it does not.
As a child, to her God!
What is the reason for fear that nobody loves you?
A practicing psychologist will help in this matter:
Step # 5: "I'm not a magician, I'm just learning": refuse to idealize yourself and other people if you are worried about the problem "No one loves me".
Without demanding from yourself the appearance, like one of the models of Victoria`s Secret, the intellect of the Nobel laureate and the manner of the Queen of England, you automatically agree that you can( and you need) simply because you are here!
Have you heard about the concept of "unconditional love"?Nobody told?
And all your attempts at self-development should be a thrill, like the first year in the year to go to barbecue. And no one but you knows better what will bring you pleasure, that you love.
"When I'm tired of myself, so collected, single-minded and eternally cultivating, I arrange a date with myself: just walking around the city listening to my favorite music on the headphones, buying books, going to the movies, drinking favorite vanilla coffee on the bench in the park.
So "charging" a positive for a few weeks to love yourself and others, "- to share Rita from St. Petersburg.
And do not expect that other people will madly love you - let them also enjoy the most fascinating relationships in life - a romance with yourself.
In addition, obsession with someone does not add "points" to a person. And you need someone flawed?
That's when two such self-loving people will meet - all, spark, madness, whether it's personal relationships or business!
Question « Why does no one love me? "none of them arise, because they do not have time for these" Oblomov "self-care - you need to work on yourself, develop, sincerely communicate with other people and" kayfovat "of life.