Think about it. .. We complain so often about our life: "The work is bad, colleagues are creepy, there are no real friends, the husband / wife is unloved, parents are fed up with their morals, and even that fatty aunt with string bags in the cornerminibuses irritates with their telephone calls! "
We are indignant and lamenting the injustice of such a fate, not wanting to realize that it is not in the veil and not in our environment, but in ourselves!
Find out how to change yourself for the better, , and your life will swing instead of a bumpy path along a faultless asphalt path.
How to change yourself for the better: or how I hate everyone
All five years with me in one group studied girl Nastya.
She was( how would you better explain this?) - the descent of Hell( here without exaggeration).
The worst person I've probably never met in real life.
In pairs she came in turn, then with a sour, then with a spiteful expression of her face, adored doing mucks, provoked scandals, humiliated the weak.
We tried to stay away from it, so Nastya naturally did not make any student friends.
But what struck me the most, is the confidence of a classmate that the world CONTINUE her car of happiness.
And the fact that until now he had not reached her, it was, in Nastya's opinion, either an act of the highest injustice, or the intrigues of enemies.
Another paradox was that the classmate considered herself an excellent person, whom people shun absolutely undeservedly.
We did not even try to explain something to her, because it's more expensive to communicate with such a person.
Clouds all thickened and thickened, but a real thunder erupted in a practical lesson, the theme of which was " How to change yourself for the better ".
To conduct it our teacher invited her friend - a colleague from another university.
All our teachers were familiar with the peculiarities of Nastya's worldview and long ago gave up on her with the hand, they say, "To study well, the rest is her business," but the guest was not invited.
Therefore, I was very surprised when the girl began to prove to her that she did not need to improve anything in herself.
The teacher did not agree, and the rather emotional dialogue ended with Nastya's cry: "How I hate all of you! Because of you, I'm so unhappy! ".
Whom the young lady had in mind, did not specify.
I do not know how her life was today, we all crossed ourselves with relief, when there was no need to see her every day, but I do not think that she is too happy, because she could never learn from her mistakes.
How to change yourself for the better: why is it so difficult?
Of course, the main reason why we continue to be not very good people is the non-recognition of the problem. As in Nastya's situation, she is firmly convinced of her own infallibility.
All difficulties, cautious attitude towards us from others, non-acceptance of the collective, conflicts and so on, we write off on everything: bad people, coincidence, fate, so the stars converged, etc.
It's much easier for us to blame someone else than to honestly say to ourselves and others: "Yes, I'm a bad person( or a person that leads a wrong way of life), but I promise to improve and I will do everything to make change for the better !"
If you expect that someone will accept you" the way you are ", then you're just a lazy sludge. Because, as a rule, "the way it is" is a sad sight. Change, beast. Work on yourself. Or die alone.
Faina Ranevskaya
Other reasons why we continue to stay in the cozy embrace of our own delusions are:
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Life difficulties.
To some, fate does not give too many tests, but for someone - with excess.
The greatest skill is to stand all the trials without being embittered at the same time against the whole world.
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Weakness.
You seem to want to completely change your life, and you see the root of the problem, but there is no power to act.
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Environment.
Environment plays a very big role in positive changes.
If your family and friends support and help you in everything, then the process will be easy and painless.
But if others say: "He is a monster, he is a lost person, he will never change," then sooner or later you will believe it.
How to change yourself for the better: 10 ways to
It's much harder to change yourself, than, for example, to change your life.
You will have a hard, long and exhausting work.
If you intend to change yourself for the better, then, I hope, these tips will help you:
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See the good in those who surround you.
Mom grumbles, "Where are you so dressed up," because he worries that you do not catch cold, and not because he likes to pick on you.This principle applies to all friends, relatives and colleagues.
If you do not surround solid steel-Hitler's, then it's not hard to see good in people.
- Get rid of bad habits - smoking, alcohol in large quantities, eating, drugs( God forbid!) - ballast, which your new "I" is not needed.
- Program your thoughts positively: "I look good!", "I will succeed", "Soon the sun will come out," "I will be promoted" - you should only operate with such phrases!
- Arrange a personal life - mutual love is really capable of inspiring.
- The correct order of the day: get up early, be sure to take time for sports and reading, write lists of cases.
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Start doing something good.
These can be small good deeds( buy an old woman neighbor products, get abandoned by children on a tree ball, take home a homeless kitten) or work in a volunteer organization on a regular basis.
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Stop lying to yourself and those around you.
Lie even on trifles - generally self-destructive enough. -
Manage your emotions.
In any conflict situation, try to calm your rage, and then, having a sober look at it, decide whether you need to continue to take part in the scandal or better to leave.
The same applies to other negative emotions: jealousy, envy, selfishness, etc.
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Changing the nature and habits, do not forget about the appearance.
Unwashed hair, dirty nails and extra pounds do not color even the most good person.
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Before you start blaming someone for difficulties, analyze your behavior.
In most cases, we are the culprits of the problems ourselves.
Be sure to look at the positive, and most importantly useful cartoon about the
that all the problems are hidden in our heads!
Work on your thoughts and life change in two counts!😉
Naturally, reading the article " How to change yourself for the better" ? "Does not help you to wake up suddenly very different and most importantly - an excellent person.
Ahead of you waiting for months, and even years of hard work and self-control.
But imagine just how wonderful your life will be if you become much better yourself.