What is the middle age crisis in men, when it comes, when it begins and ends, what are the consequences? How long does the crisis of middle age in men, how does it manifest itself, how to overcome, what should the wife do?

How is the midlife crisis in men and the ways that help to cope with a man in this period with depression.

Did the women have such situations when once a cheerful and cheerful loved one suddenly becomes sullen and irritable? Frequent depression already seem to you the norm? Congratulations, your chosen one moved smoothly into middle age and felt the crisis of this period. Let's work out together what this time is and how to cope with it.

What is the midlife crisis in men?

Not all women really assess the situation in which a man appeared during a crisis of middle age. Wives think that all this is a trifle and nonsense. But for a man this is deeply psychological stress.

After all, during this period in the understanding of a man, he ceases to be a reckless guy( even if already 10 years in marriage), but becomes a serious and responsible man. And if the wife does not support and does not calm the man, he can not only close in himself, but even go into a long drinking or find solace in another woman.

What is such a middle-aged crisis? In fact, it's just a certain milestone, when a man already has a status, family and a certain circle of communication. But for a man, the crisis has its own specific nuances.

He suddenly realizes that he is already half the life behind him and is eyeing what he has. In addition, it looks very meticulously - the car could be better, the house is bigger, the wife is more beautiful. And here it is, depression has come.

The crisis of middle age in men

According to his personal standards, everything that he has achieved very modestly. Again, he remembers his mistakes, which were in the moment, in his opinion, of youth. And realizing that not all of them managed to be fixed, it's even sadder.

The next step is to reassess values. Now, what I wanted to achieve before does not seem so desirable. And what is desirable - it is very unrealistic. A man becomes unclear what he needs and how to get it.

In addition, the man believes that he is still hoo and must do everything better than the young guys at work, in the hall during training. And when for some reason this does not happen, then a wave of negative emotions simply covers the man. And coming to the mirror, and seeing a couple of new wrinkles or gray hair along with the outlined fox, the man loses the remnants of optimism.

Signs and symptoms of the mid-life crisis in men at 30, 33, 35, 40, 45, 50, 52 years and after

So, let's look at how men look and feel during a mid-life crisis. It is also important to take into account that it lasts not a week, not a month, but it can last several years.

• The behavior of a man is drastically changing. Already there is no that merry fellow - there was a gloomy depressive man. Calm as before, the guys become the opposite of the soul of the company, they can excessively join the alcohol.
• At work a man walks now very reluctantly. After all, 20 years ago he dreamed that he would become the head of the holding, but it turned out that now he is only a manager in a trading company. But he realistically understands that achieving something will be more difficult than at the age of 20.If you do not support the man in time, you can get to the dismissal from work.
• Accompanied by a worsening of the psychological state, the man develops a deterioration in physical health. After all, as has long been proven, all problems are from the nerves. And worrying about any failures, a man faces a deterioration in his health.
• The man becomes displeased for any reason - the favorite borsch is now under-salted and sour, a beautiful wife suddenly found a stomach and cellulite. And he himself turns into an old man. These thoughts just overwhelm a man with a heavy load.

From 30 to 33 years, a man has another crisis period, when he gains complete independence and freedom. And it is very important not to let a man savor freedom, because if he is married, then this union will weigh him down. Free people, however, gaining freedom, will not want to burden themselves with family ties.

From time immemorial, a man was an earner and a warrior. But over time, the biological clock, ticking, led the guy to irreversible aging processes. Hence the crisis arose, because realizing that youth is passing, there are also:

• Decline of forces
• Hormonal changes
• Decreased libido and, as a consequence, potencies
• Weight growth

The crisis of middle age in men can be compared with menopause in women. This can be associated with a lowered level of testosterone in the blood. But men absolutely do not want to lose their past success, including sexually. Therefore, often after 35 years of they have several more women's hearts.

A difficult period for a man

Thus a man proves first of all himself that he can still attract the attention of women. Ie it's just self-assertive.

And if, before 35 years, men are looking for themselves and achieve certain goals, after 40 they are already considering and evaluating all that they have achieved. And in the opinion of psychologists, the man in 40-45 years wants to see himself as follows:

• In his career - the warrior-winner
• In the family - the head and the getter
• Steering wheel - only the high-class car and the powerful yacht
• In the society - the recognition and admiration of

And nowif this is all achieved, then the man does not have any joy. Again, by the age of 50, more and more fears are emerging. What to do next? Buy another car or a house, go to the resort. But all this somehow does not cause that which can cause enthusiasm for many.

And his wife, it seems to him, is no longer so excited about his successes. And buying another fur coat is considered a given, without gratitude in the eyes.

In addition, from 40 to 55 years, a man is terribly tormented by one thought - he may lose potency. And without this, as the powerful of this world believe, they already mean nothing. And here it begins, as in the well-known proverb "gray hair in a beard, a demon in the rib".

A man has many fears

Young mistresses in the opinion of men of age stimulate his libido and improve potency. But that's what a mistake makes men - they think that it is the deterioration of potency that has cooled their family life and support it with the help of young girls. But it is the presence of a mistress( a rare woman does not know about the opponent) worsens her personal life.

After all, a woman also worries that it is not as fresh as before. And maybe a man lost interest in her. So it turns out a snowball from a misunderstanding that can destroy a family.

It is important to have patience, because the crisis in a man can be from 3 to 5 years. And often the outcome of this period depends on the wise behavior of relatives and wife. After all, the endurance of the wife and children will help to return to the family and the habitual circle of the man. And not the desire to understand the psychological disorders of the husband lead to the disintegration of the family.

When does the crisis of middle age in men begin and end, how long does it last?

As we have already found out earlier the crisis of middle age is a very individual period, which can begin both in 30 and 50 years. It all depends on the inner spirit of the man and the values ​​he has - family, children, successful work.

The fewer values ​​a man has, the earlier and longer the crisis period may last. Therefore, it is important to identify the cause in time and carry out comprehensive measures to eliminate partner depression. The wife needs to have conversations with her husband, support him, connect the children to a joint time.

It is important for a man to understand that he is not alone and everything is in his power. Only then will a middle-aged crisis pass for a man quickly and with the least emotional feelings. If the wife and children themselves can not help a man, then it may be necessary for to seek help from a psychologist.

The crisis of middle age in men - depression: how to survive, how to get out of it?

Depression in middle age crisis is a phenomenon that you will not be surprised at. But it must be overcome. Let's see how to do it.

Let's consider all in stages:

• Problems at work - the low salary, eternally dissatisfied management, envious colleagues.

In this case, you need to find out if this type of activity is necessary for you. Maybe it's worth taking a short vacation and looking for a new job. Yes it is difficult and can even be frightening to start something at first. But is it worse than going to the service, as to hard labor. Or maybe you try to work for yourself. You just need to decide on the field of activity and not pass.

• Problems with his wife - misunderstanding, scandals.

It is important here not to be selfish. Reconsider the sovi behavior, because not only the woman is not right in everything. Think about how best to smooth out this or that situation. Take a step forward and get two steps in return.

Psychologist

may be needed. But if the man himself can not cope with depression and the situation only worsens, then you need to visit a specialist. An experienced psychologist will be able to help, find common ground and ways to solve the problem.

In addition, if the depression is deep, then the therapist can resort to medical treatment.

IMPORTANT: Drug treatment should only be carried out by a psychotherapist. Do not need to treat a man with medicines that helped a relative or colleague. The choice of the drug is selected individually, taking into account the degree of depressive state.

Medication may consist of:

• Antidepressants, which is a huge number. All of them contribute to the elimination of anxiety, depression. And also improve sleep and appetite.
• Tranquilizers, which are used at the beginning of treatment with a short-term course. The effect of taking drugs comes about after 2 weeks.
• Mood stabilizers. These drugs eliminate depressive disorder and stabilize the mood. After taking a man, there will be no mood swings in the depressive side.
• Vitamins - for the normalization of the nervous system use the vitamin B group.

The crisis of middle age in men - mistress, leaving the family: what to do to a woman?

With a crisis of middle age, a man faced every woman. Very often a man finds a solution to the issue in a new hobby, a young girl who will raise his mood and not only.

The result of such a spree is often a divorce and most often on the initiative of his wife. And in vain, because going to the side, a man never at first thinks about leaving a family. A man after 35 in this case can look for new positive emotions and a sexual charge, no more. And no matter how the wives did not think about eternal love, but the man is fed up with family ties and is looking for fire on the side.

But many men at the age of 40 recognize that their wife completely suits them as a companion, mistress and mother. A girl on the side - this is just a temporary hobby. And while spending time with his mistress, the man first of all thinks about keeping secrets. After all, he is an excellent family man, careerist and caring father. And if this happens, then the combination of mistress + wife brings him a positive emotional surge.

But all the secret once becomes explicit and the time comes when the wife from the "well-wishers" finds out about treason. And very often this tells the mistress herself, thinking that, thus, the man will get her alone. Not every woman is ready to spend all her life in the background.

A man may have a mistress

And now if they did not convict treason, then within a year or two the man was fed up with a young passion, and he returned to the quiet family beach. But in life there are unpredictable and unexpected situations. What to do?

It is important for a woman in this situation to behave with restraint and correctness. And this means that the husband in time of crisis depression did not go away to seek solace on the side, try to follow yourself, be well-groomed and feminine. Support the man, listen to him and be a friend, partner and an excellent lover.

But do not turn caring for yourself into fanaticism. Otherwise, a man will leave his eternally brilliant wife with long nails and false eyelashes to where he is simply prepared a delicious borscht. Find the golden mean.

But imagine that you were informed about treason. What are your actions. Yes, in the first place I want to tear all my hair off my mistress, slap my husband and put him out the door, expecting him to crawl on his knees daily begging for forgiveness.

A man can even decide to divorce

But it is important to understand the psychology of a forty-year-old man. At this age, they no longer want problems, although many do not want this ever. And especially if the one, the other, accepts him with open arms, it can turn out so that by collecting his things, you will only make his life easier. He will calmly go into the warm embrace of contented passion.

But we are not suited to such a course of events. Therefore, remember these rules:

• Keep your mouth shut. Yes, it is difficult and I want to do something disgusting mistress for all. But be wise, this will be reckoned with later. And later, when everything ends well for you, you put the spouse on the first number. But now it is important not to disclose these personal nuances.
• Find an ally. Do not believe it, but your mother-in-law will help you. She also worries about her beloved son. And if she finds out that he abandoned his children and his wife for the sake of a young woman, they would not be happy. Maybe for a start she will show irony towards her daughter-in-law, that, supposedly, she behaved badly with her son, once she had gone on a spree. But you will have a conversation with a man, be sure.
• Obtain information about the opponent. A man you do not know the truth, besides, he will easily tell you that he has nothing to do with what she bewitched, gave to drink, etc. But you need to learn as much as possible about it all and understand what attracted her to your man.

Here the victory will be won by the one that is wiser and more mature, cunning and calm. You just need to let go of your husband, yes, you did not misinterpret. Just tell your husband: "If she is more dear to you, then you can be with her. But you must know that I can not live without you, because I love and cherish you. "

Remember that the best way to keep a man is to let him go. In no event should you expel your husband. Even if it is very painful and see it there is no strength. Talk to the partner and let him talk.

It is also important to learn how to forgive. Yes, it is difficult and painful, but all people are mistaken. And maybe right now your husband realized how dear you and your family are to him.

A man needs help

The main thing to remember is that it's important to be attentive to each other. Do not spend leisure time with books and TV alone, but do everything together, find common interests, travel. And then the husband will be so carried away by the family and the wife that behind the joyful impressions he will not allow the demon to penetrate into his soul and body.

When is the most difficult age for men - the crisis years?

In men, the crisis period can be more than once, and in different periods of life a man is trapped by situations that cause him a depressive state. These periods can be conditionally divided into the following:

• 13-16 years - at this age the guy wants to seem very grown-up not only in the eyes of others, but also in his own. An important action at this moment is the demonstration of independence from parents. But in response there are often only conflicts and misunderstandings.
• 21-23 years - during this period, the study is already completed and you have to bear responsibility for your actions at work. It's no longer possible to skip a couple or do homework. Now you have to come to work early and maybe stay up late. Hanging out with friends is not so often happening. This all at first can cause in a young man a sense of throwing, nervousness, fussiness.
• 30 years - this period for some is a harbinger of the crisis, and some of it is already completely seized at this age. During this period, the man begins to realize what he achieved in life and what niche he took. It is understood that some of the bars have been overstated and, accordingly, have not been achieved.

Men have several crisis periods

• 35 years - at this point the man starts to look at his environment. And first of all it concerns the wife and children. Now it seems to him that the love has already passed, but a routine and a time that does not return. Now the days for him fly inexorably, adding new wrinkles on his face. Where is there without depression. Quite often there are also quarrels, scandals, and zagulas of a depressed man. But, if the wife finds the strength to endure this period, then the man with time passes depression and he begins to live more realistically, to set achievable goals and successfully achieve them.
• By the age of 40 the a man has a new degree of depression. And even if a person is successful enough, then the reason is new. Namely - the disease. At this age, the man most likely was already in the hospital for one reason or another, watching for chronic diseases from friends with whom he could have been bored for several days in a row. And very often there are thoughts of death. After all, age, in their opinion, already obliges to think about it. It is important to inform the man that you just need to monitor your own health and lead a healthy lifestyle.
• 50 years old - now a man becomes more and more like a small child. In addition, the child is painful, the man constantly begins to hurt something. But if a wife does not support a man at this most difficult moment for him, then it is possible that he will find a young girl who will take care and look naively in the eyes of a loved one. Here he will seek reassurance.

Try to help a man cope with emotional disruptions. Understand that perhaps it seems like a trifle to you, but for a stronger sex such failures become a problem and very serious. Take care of your loved ones!

Middle age crisis in men: what are the consequences?

No matter how long the depression lasted, it can not last forever. And so it is important to consider the possible consequences of this period. They can be:

• Favorable. After much agonizing reflection, the man decides that his wife is still a reliable support and support, his children love him, and the work brings pleasure. Therefore, the man begins to set himself more realistic goals and returns to normal cheerful life.

The crisis period may end favorably

• Unfavorable. In this case, a man who does not like anything in his life, everything starts to change abruptly. This applies to everything: wife, work, environment. Very often without success in a new life, a man knocks at the door of his abandoned wife. But not always this door is opened. Such events can involve a man in a new depression and leave, as they say, a broken trough.

The crisis of middle age in men: how to overcome?

If you are looking for a solution to the problem of a middle-aged crisis in your man on the Internet, then you are right and make a mistake. Right because you need to read the information, psychological advice of other people. This must be done in order to be prepared for a different course of the depressed state of a man. But the mistake can be that not all measures are applicable to your husband. All people are individual, and what helped one woman's husband does not always help yours.

We offer you general recommendations of behavior if your men have a period of mid-life crisis:

• Do not say out loud for men the word "crisis", "middle age".In any sentence, they will cut his ears and set sorrow.
• Try not to quarrel and not to hysteria. A man who will observe constant disagreements with his wife, will try to find a quiet harbor on the side.
• A man needs a good listener. And they should be the wife. If he can not share problems with the companion, he will begin to seek a solution to the issue in alcohol.
• If the depression is very deep and prolonged, then it may be necessary to consult a therapist. For a man, this seems like an extremely bad idea, but try to convince him that this is the only correct way out.

A woman needs to try to understand a man, no matter how painful it is.

• A successful and self-confident woman should be next to a man. You do not have to walk in an old dressing gown and with a bundle on your head. Become stylish and often go out with a companion in the light - gather with friends, go to the cinema or travel with children to nature. He must understand that he needs and is important to his family.
• So that a man does not think to find a fire on the side, bring this fire into your intimate life yourself. Try to experiment and surprise. It will definitely work in the best possible way.
• You need to find the strength and be calmer with respect to the antics of the husband. Be wiser and support it in everything.

The crisis of middle age in men: what you need to know his wife and mistress?

More or less understanding what you need to do, it's time to study the main errors. These are the actions that can not be performed:

• Do not impose yourself to a man in depression with advice. Do not use: "I believe", "I'm sure", "I know how it's better."A man must understand that he himself is able to make a decision.
• Do not blame yourself for your husband's depression. This stage is to a greater or lesser extent tolerated by every man.
• A man should not see your tears. In this situation, he will not spare you, but only get angrier.
• Do not be offended if a man does not show signs of attention to you, he is now all in himself and his problems. But you, in turn, show tenderness and support a partner. This will give him confidence in his need.
• Give the man freedom, let him calmly think. But watch to this freedom he did not like.
• Do not talk about divorce. In this state, a man can easily agree to this, and then you will have to regret.
• No scenes of jealousy. This can lead either to a groundless scandal from scratch or leaving a man out of your life.
• Do not stop watching for yourself. Go in for sports, go to beauty salons. Be in shape, but do not make a doll of yourself. Self-development partner will cheer man.

A husband needs a family warmth

A middle-aged crisis in a man is inevitable. But thanks to close people and a pleasant home atmosphere, it can be quick and easy.

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